Thursday, December 13, 2012

Kunal Kohli Essay's Romances with Rani Mukherjee, Karina Kapoor & Amisha Patel

What Is KK's  Personal Take On Love Sex Romance? 

Fanaa, the Bollywood Movie set in Kashmir where Aamir Khan romances Kajol, was for me one of the more poignant love stories I’ve seen in recent Hindi Filmlore.  Kunal Kohli, the director and writer of this romance has explored the themes of love and interplay between the dynamics of a man woman relationship. 

He has said so much in his films about love and romance, and I am curious as to what he finds attractive in a woman? What in a relationship attracts him and excites him ? And most importantly, while decoding the man woman chemistry in Teri Meri Kahani, Hum Tum and Mujhse Dosti Karoge- how much of him exists in his movies?

He has essayed romances with Rani Mukherji, Kajol, Amisha Patel, Kareena Kapoor and Deepika Padukone where a subliminal message seems to come through, literally like a conversation spoken aloud by him on celluloid, on the subject of romance and love. I am curious!

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Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Salman Khan & Shah Rukh Khan are'nt the only grown-ups with fall-outs in friendships

An excitable voice across the phone line. Tanisha demands that her friend Anita show solidarity. “This is your true test of friendship” insists Tanisha, who's taken cudgels with another friend, and expecting all her close friends, including Anita, to take sides. “Where is your loyalty? If you go to her party then we can never speak again Anita.” she declares.

No it was not a squabble of young schoolgirls, it was women in their thirties and forty’s squabbling over breaking up, making up, taking sides and solidarity.

 Yes, maturity is not a given and people do sometimes become even more childish than kids fighting in grade two or three. Have you not heard of Salman Khan and Shah Rukh Khan's falling out and Bollywood being called to take sides. In 2008 the Bollywood badshah Shah Rukh took a dig at Salman at a party, flippantly joking about his relationship with Aishwarya. 

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Wednesday, November 21, 2012

The Bal Thackeray Charisma with Nisha JamVwal

The Humane Side Of Bal Thackeray 

What are the key differentiators that make one human being so loved and celebrated and another unsung. 

This is the thought that occurred to me when I witnessed the last journey for the much loved, flamboyant Balasaheb, known for his provocative speeches and for crossing all political and social boundaries with much aplomb.

It seems like yesterday that we shared a glass of white wine with his preferred snack , ‘suran’. Under the enigmatic personality was a man with an engaging sense of humour and a strong point of view. So he allowed you to engage in a discussion, but very strongly put forward his. I’d call that special ingredient that engaged millions ‘charm’,  some possess it and some just cannot acquire it, hard as they might work, because I believe it belongs to those that have the gene ingrained within.

Click below to read the entire article...........

Monday, October 29, 2012

'Student Of The Year', Alia Bhatt's Film Foray & The Captain of Her Ship

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Bhatt says Tiger Mom's are not guaranteed to create successes ! Quite the Opposite!

My Mum is The Captain of my ship

The Big Bold World of Bollywood. - A petite  young girl makes her foray with none other than the Large-scale-luxury-format film maker Karan Johar’s ‘Student Of The Year’. I notice a distinct sense of quiet confidence and a sense of non-nonchalance toward it all. Maybe it comes from the fact that she was a child artist in her father’s film ‘Sangharsh’? ‘No’, she corrects me vociferously, ‘that was a long time ago. That might be just a tiny part of it. The main reason for it all is my mother, Soni Razdan. She’s not just my mother but my strength, the reason I can be self assured. My values and principles come from her. I feel awful when I lose my temper and tell her to keep quiet- she is the most understanding person in my life.”

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Best Friend Trouble?

How Do You Handle A Painful Friend?

Tweet Nisha @nishjamvwal

How do we handle a good friend who  often pokes us and pricks our self esteem and prods us to confront ourselves in a manner that we would rather not. Do we do away with the friend or how do we handle it all was a question my friend Bingo posted on her facebook status. 

-She seemed to suggest the friend becomes a pain in the neck that we're better off without because she was at a stage in life when she is fairly attuned to what she wants and has chosen to be. To the many responses she elicited on her ‘wall’ the most balanced ones echoed my belief strongly.

My life has been about friends who have been part of my growth and metamorphosis, who have kept me firmly grounded in a world where it is easy to fly away with your fabulous fantasy of yourself. A best friend becomes like a spouse, whom we have to navigate and grow with. People are not like toilet tissue- you don't 'discard' them- you  also allow them to know when they're being a pain in the neck. You know, I've actually enjoyed the meanderings of understanding the ups and downs of relationships. You begin to take the good with the bad, as my good friend Tanaz so wisely said just yesterday!

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Sunday, September 30, 2012



This is the most kaleidoscopic festival 
in Bombay- Ganesha Chaturthi. I'm nearly always surprized, year after year, at how it infuses the city with a sense of high, a melody that seems to permeate the atmosphere all around, a bonding across all cultures and religions. This festival that falls on the fourth day of the waxing moon around August, is the start of the festive season in India and

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Sunday, September 23, 2012

Suniel Shetty On Keeping The Spark Alive

Tweet Nisha at @nishjamvwal


A well known Bollywood actor standing at a party, talking to fawning -eager friends that ingratiate themselves to him. He is polite, attentive, but his hand is groping for someone. He doesn’t find her and becomes distracted from the crowd thronging him. He is looking for his wife. 

Rare wouldn’t you say? Especially in Bombay’s fast lifestyle where many men post a ‘love you’ for their wives on BBM while they are having private nookies with sexy young women ever available for that excitement of a married man? The wife looks lovingly at him, saying “I’m right here babes”! 

This is a tiny vignette, symbolic to the tone of Suniel Shetty’s marriage to Mana.

Obviously, living among the social set, where married women and men take each other so much for granted, reprimand each other publicly  or are over polite and indulgent to cover up an affair, I am curious about what makes this marriage so intimate and special. 

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Sunday, September 9, 2012

Priyanka Chopra & Shah Rukh Khan's Affection's! Wive's wake-up before it's too late!

Shah Rukh Khan & Priyanka's camaraderie! Is it a PATI , PATNI AUR WOH situation?! 
Wife's wake-up to the 'Cocktail' of Hearts before it's too late!
The Other Woman, in A Marriage! 

Tweet Nisha @nishjamvwal

Yes it’s the oldest story in the history of man and woman. And my friend, a regular in the 'lunch group' circuit and quite fond of being popular, is oblivious to the fact that while her husband is at dinner with her, and she is busily bbm-ing her own bff- best girl-friend for life, her husband is in a torrid affair with a social butterfly fond of her brands and page three appearances.

They are in a torrid affair, the wife's(good friend who’s super sweet to the wife,  and her husband. But you see the lunch groupie is most preoccupied arranging her social life, her kids music lessons, their tennis games and tuition's to even notice. The husband is around anyway, everyday- and he’ll be around until death do them apart; Right? 

Not quite right. He has been gone a long time ago, and all her friends know about it, but none would dare to tell her. She’ll just be the last one to know, because history does repeat itself. For years and years this is the way it’s been. The wife is indeed the last to find out, that her husband is in a torrid affair. Right under her nose. That's Bombay society. 

In the film 'Cocktail' Deepika Padukone is oblivious to the fact that her boyfriend, while partying and at the beach with her, is falling helplessly in love with her best friend Diana Penty!!!  

Closer to reality, Priyanka Chopra and Shah Rukh Khan allegedly grew close through the filming of Don and it's sequel and were rumored to be in a relationship. Of late rumors abound about a wedding between this very attractive screen couple abound.  Infact, recently when Shah Rukh Khan Sang 'marry Me' to Priyanka at a public function ( while people were charmed and even amused by the Shah's
gumption and naughtiness, it did raise speculation. And yes rumors of a clandestine wedding are also rife! This is one romance that audiences are very curious about, so much so that when I travel abroad, it seems to be the one question on everyone's lips, are they or are they not...............?

( )

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Thursday, August 30, 2012

Mary Kom- The Fighter, The Winner, The Success, The Strife!

 Tweet Nisha @nishjamvwal

Yes! I did have tears in my eyes right through the tough fight that got Mary Kom the bronze  at the first time women's boxing event that had been introduced at the London Olympic 2012. Every Indian was rooting for her, most partial to her win, above all other competitors. What makes Mary so special? So why is the movie 'Mary Kom' so happily glossing over the main fight she went through- the Olympics?

The palpable vulnerability & power of a dream comes through brilliantly in #PriyankaChopra's frustration, pain, anger, angst through her performance as and in the Movie Mary Kom - seldom did I see Priyanka Chopra in the performance, I almost always saw Mary Kom. After having met and known #MaryKom - and I will share excerpts of my conversations with you.  I do feel that Sanjay Leela Bhansali has spun a winner- but I wasn't as gripped in the first half as in the second, personal vignettes & development of her personal struggle & lack of nutrition which I happen to know of, her angst & strife need to have been somewhat more strongly communicated! 

And yet I was moved by the fighter, the mother, the winner MC Mary Kom- Kudos @Priyanka, #MaryKom #SanjayLeelaBhansali & #Omungkumar. My favorite after Onler & Priyanka is the Coach, the understated yet powerful actor Thapa. Onler's story & his personal sacrifices come through beautifully, where men support their women to pursue a dream- that is truly what #Onler did, it is not even slightly exaggerated. Eventually I do wish the #Olympic story had been fleshed out better.

I have over the years been moved by Mary Kom's story, her chats with me, her fortitude and her ability to laugh.  From a tribal community of north-eastern state of Manipur- epitomizes a woman who despite many odds came up triumphant. She was fighting opponents who weighed 54 kg, four inches taller and yet she did win a bronze. She works very hard for every single win she’s achieved. But so does her entire family. The take out is that there are stronger people in a competitive world, but hard work backed by a supportive family give you that x-factor that makes you a winner and a hero in life.

Click below to read entire article...........

Sunday, August 26, 2012

The Dating & Mating Game-thoughts & tips!


Tweet Nisha @nishjamvwal

A close friend recently broke up with a long time boyfriend. A big surprize considering he was close to becoming a fiancé.  

Last evening at tea she confided that among other reasons, the most upsetting to her was his reluctance to cough up when the bill arrived. He looked shiftily away and uncomfortably glanced around at the surrounding. 

A woman does, after all, want to be looked after and ‘going dutch’ was just not working for her. She wanted out, and much begging and pleading by her beau to save the relationship, at the end didn't work it! She was just not interested in a freeloader. 

After hearing her out,  a similar question came to  my mind. I have always been raised with the notion that a gentleman pay’s for the meal when he asks a lady out. To my mind it somehow emasculates a man to be taken out to dinner by his girl when he has done the inviting and is the host, especially in the beginning. 

Maybe the odd birthday or ‘treat’  a woman picks up the tab, but on a regular basis a man takes  a woman out isn't it?

Don't get me wrong, I do agree that its a free and equal world I agree. But who are we kidding. In the dating and mating game, the man is the one that is primordially programmed to be the aggressor!  

Yes I know, its a touchy subject. And yes, in today's age a man feels suckered paying all the time. The argument  being that when women want equality and often earn more than a man these days, why should they not take the tab or at least go dutch. Why does the equality not extend to the bill? That a modern and contemporary woman is equal in all respects and must shoulder the responsibility equally? 

Going deeper into a relationship , I do feel that a couple can discuss and come to an understanding of what works for them, basis their unique situation. A woman may be a wealthy banker and the man could be involved with a start-up with not much money to spare. 

A relationship goes through cycles. She may not have that much at a later date and the man may have by then got a successful unit where he is able to lavish his woman with all the luxuries. Once you are knee deep in the relationship where you are approaching being so close as to view your ups and downs as each other’s problems, it becomes fine to share responsibilities.

Two things to watch out for here are if the more wealthy partner expects "payment" of another kind in return, keeping a little mental list of all his extravagances and expects you to make up for them- then that is bad news. But if you are not being exploited, enjoy every moment of what your man gives you with grace. Another scenario to beware of is if a poorer partner uses the relationship for the free ride and the luxuries it provides, piggy backing on the goodies. Asking you to ‘invest’ in his business.  He has agenda’s then and is using his woman, and yes I’ve seen that a lot these days.

When we speak of the initial phases of a man ‘taking a woman out’ however,                                  somehow the charming tradition of men paying for dates is no longer the norm. Is it the economy? Or have men become cheaper? Personally, when on a date, while I would reach for my wallet, I’d be half-expecting a man to say, “I’ve got it”. While I  don’t think it’s fair for a guy to always pick up the check later into a relationship -especially if the man and woman are financially more or less the same- the traditional path while being wooed , of being taken out and looked after is always more romantic for the woman in me.

I know of a funny incidence where a chap took a middle aged South-Indian female actor out to a restaurant called Amythest in Madras, invited another male friend along mid way and smsed him across the table to take the tab to his utter horror. Now that is what I'd call cheesy. A man must not be a show off where he goes beyond his means to woo a woman at the cost of begging , borrowing or stealing. It is better to be what one is right from the start than create equations in pretense. 

The worst of course is when a man lacks largesse by letting a woman know how much a meal cost, or makes a big ado by paying with words like ‘this one’s on me’ , than subtly just taking the tab and being nonchalant about it. 

Here again the ‘if you want equal pay for equal work, you’d better be okay with paying your half of the check some of the time” is an understandable argument. But I believe a man who cannot lavish a woman in the initial few dates is not one who might be able to responsible later.

Paying initially is not just the gentlemanly thing to do, it also indicates that a man is responsible, steady and well-established. Women like that; it helps them decide whether or not a man is relationship-ready. The way you treat your woman and the way you conduct yourself, that's what defines you as a man.

Nisha JamVwal

Written for & Published by Asian Age & Deccan Chronicle

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Biwi No 1 With David Dhawan

Faith and Space is the Bedrock of their successful marriage

Some time ago I discovered David Dhawan- and what an escape it was!  Frothing merriment, irreverence and side splitting humor. Rules are cast to the wind as zany heroes and delectable heroines wend their way through improbable situations and story lines that just about manage to teeter within the possible! This packaged escapade revives and I am once again ready to meet the world “ Ek Chotisi break ke baad”!!

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Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Relationships Are Not Just About Good Sex! What Women Want...

Tweet Nisha @nishjamvwal

Recently a man at dinner asked- "Nisha please tell me what turns women on, women are so difficult to figure out!"

Yes I agree! (and it might take me a book to answer that one!)  

Men try to figure us out, but don't always succeed!  And yes things would be so much easier if they knew some few pointers, so that they knew at those special moments what matters to us?
Don't get me wrong! I’m not saying we want effeminate men who are fêting us at every moment, but yes to be better understood might work to smooth-en a relationship. So recently when I met an ardent reader of this column who pleaded with me to write about ‘what do women essentially want in a man, i'd really like to know, they baffle me!’ Does a women enjoy being wined and dined, to bring her flowers, offer compliments, text her every hour and without a fail wish her "sweet dreams" every single night he asked me. 

These are superficial, short term courting options. No. The reality is quite different. This is why I thought , yes, I’d ask some of my girlfriends to tell me what are the special traits that would clinch it for them in terms of falling for the ‘right’ man, or what are the major put offs in their book?

Let me start with the big put offs- ‘Freeloaders’ and ‘name droppers’ are revolting, that make women want to run a mile.

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Sunday, July 15, 2012

Sex Hormones That Create Havoc

When Hormones Wreck Harmony What Do You Do?
Tweet Nisha @nishjamvwal

Yes everyone shies away from the H- word- And yet we all know it exists! Men dread it and women sometimes pretend to themselves that they might be the chosen ones unaffected by the onslaught.

Hormones do play havoc in a woman’s life- Yes  more pronouncedly than men. - And many relationships struggle and fall apart because the participants don't realize the dynamics of Hormones- PMS and its effects. 

As a general rule, women tend to get cranky, have mood changes, bouts of irritability and depression, and yes –suddenly get upset, or have the sudden need to gorge on chocolates once they approach the peak of their menstrual cycle. PMS!!!

Seventy-five percent women with regular menstrual cycles report unpleasant physical or psychological symptoms premenstrually which is normal and for many women the effects are mild and tolerable. But the interpersonal problems come up more pronouncedly for women whose symptoms can be disabling and then cause significant disruption in their lives.

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Saturday, July 7, 2012

A Mum & Daughter Working Together As Equals! How Does it Work?

A Mum & Daughter Working Together As Equals! How Does it Work?

A mother daughter is a tenuous relationship as it is, but when they work together it can be a tight rope walk I’m guessing. And so when I walked the ramp for Neeta Lulla’s Marriot show I was pleasantly surprised to see Nishika and Neeta Lulla’s bon-homos, back slapping rapport with each other, so seamless and happy- it was a delight to my surprised eyes.

Neeta never saw Nishika as an extension of herself, but as an independent identity right from the beginning. She gave her respect and never reprimanded her infront of her peers, a big mistake that some parents make, unmindful of the acute sensitivity of a child infront of her peers- 


Saturday, June 30, 2012

Sex & Romance on the Internet-Loving Dangerously Seeking Adventure!

Dangerous Love Exciting Romance 

Apart from the obvious dangers,friendships are likely to move into deeper seas of intimacy and at a faster pace, as the level of inhibitions may be relaxed behind the veil of anonymity that the digital screen provides, & even well meaning encounters may be doomed by hasty assessments & subjective perceptions. What one believes may nöt be what is.

Sure , the internet has made dating and mating an easier game. And yes its adventurous; its sexy; it has its thrills; and provides multiple opportunities apart from the flesh and blood ‘been there done that’ option that you have begun to find jaded and mundane. 

And yes I agree- the world is becoming your oyster with the internet and social networking is an exploratory diversion. You could be romancing a handsome Australian or Italian, or a Brazilian beauty by the clicking of some computer keys. 

You can also find a spouse and are no longer restricted by the matrimonial columns or relatives suggesting some ‘eligible’ partner. 
So many internet sites shout out 'Meet sweet pretty girls online for dating' and the subtext is 'mating' too!!! 

But anything that is too good to be true usually is. Too good to be true that is.
Disguised identities, stalkers, rapists, fake photographs abound on the net. Did you know that internet infidelity is the cause for many a divorce, and the statistic of dating, mating and breaking has gone up monumentally due to the ease and availability of sex and relationships, nudity and 'friendships' on the internet?...............

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Thursday, June 21, 2012

Attraction Grows with achieving personal dreams! Love Yourself First

Are you Half A Couple

Yes I know that clingy feeling too well. You’re in love, and every minute is either a thought, or a feeling about the him or the her that occupies every minute of your being alive. You are in love!

Another scenario- you’re married and your life is about the spouse and the house. Chores, dinners, friends, all of life filled with together things about and engulfed with the life partner, for better or for worse until death do you apart!

While that is idealistic it is indeed not true always. The truth I believe is quite the opposite.

Did you stop to think about what fascinated you about your partner? The very individualistic characteristics that made the attraction happen? And the partner toward you? To retain that magic the most important thing is ‘me’ time. Time to grow, metamorphose - but happily single for that time where you find the essential you which made the attraction happen in the first place. Too much clinginess and you are just ‘half-a-couple’ joint at the hip.

Click below to read the full article..............

Monday, June 18, 2012

Shama Sikender On Boyfriend Management- Possessiveness & Letting Go

An Actors Tips on Jealousy , Possessiveness & Letting Go To Win The Game of LOVE

When the very lovely Shama Sikender declared her relationship with Alexx O’Nel, lots of admirers were heartbroken and Bombay’s set was surprised that a model and actor was giving-up her single image so openly, nonchalantly. 

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Thursday, June 7, 2012

Ramesh 'Sholay' Sippy's Wife & Ex Are Best Friends

Yours Mine & Ours

It was 

sometime ago that I remember reading about Sholay’s high-profile director’s second marriage to Kiran Juneja, a TV actress, after divorcing his first wife Geeta. This was Sippy's second marriage. Kiran, Ramesh and I became friends through my journey in Bombay and you can imagine my surprise when I received fervent invites to a movie preview to Rohan Sippy’s plays and later his wedding parties coming from Kiran. And she was genuinely involved and concerned at the attendance. 
Wasn’t the ‘step-mother’ supposed to be in the outhouse of awkwardness or were these fairy tale clichés? Is it possible to have a yours-mine and ours situation in the real world? Can the first and second wife ever be friends at all? Yes, Yes, yes, I discover in a revealing enlivening chat with Kiran and Ramesh Sippy.


Saturday, June 2, 2012

Marrying Friendship & Work, Works For Me

Yes work can definitely be fun. & this I learnt when I realized that I've always pursued professions (yes multiple's) that engaged my heart and mind. So I've been passionate about work and more work. Yes I grew up on the Hindu philosophy of work is worship, that of the Bhagvad Gita that chronicles and philosophises the teachings of the Hindu God Krishna to Arjun. The take away which  was that nothing comes before duty and work is God etc. And so it’s always been work- work- work. 


Nisha JamVwal Roller Coaster Called Life