Thursday, May 30, 2013

Karishma Kapoor Tried To Patch Up! Is It Possible Really?

Working At A Broken Relationship: Is it worth it? Or Should One Let Go? Karishma Kapoor & Sonu Nigam have the tenacity to try........

 Is It Possible to Work A Broken Relationship

A while ago, Sonu Nigam was furious with speculation about his marriage. But the fact is that there had been a breakdown of conjugal harmony, his wife had returned to her maternal home and speculation about divorce was rife with reason. An upset Sonu had acknowledged "It's a very routine situation and I'm working on it. I know my wife and I can solve the problem ......” 

And solve it he did. Kudos then to him for making an effort and working it in a scenario when people so easily give up and are more than happy to survey the greener grass on the other side (sides). The bottom line is more people -like Sonu- should work at a relationship than give up so easliy...


This is a case in point that proves that it is indeed possible to make-up and move on even when a relationship has broken up to a point of ‘nearly-no-return’. The big if is,’if’ you are lucky, tenacious and really have the desire to make it work. However with Karishma Kapoor’s on and off marital status with Sanjay Kapur, they tried too, it was a path strewn with rapids. They had separated post the birth of their first child in 2005. Even after newspapers had carried copies of their legal notices, they came together in a valorous attempt to make things work in 2010, and had another child too. Stories of their alleged estrangement from each other and the fact that they are not living together did not mar their efforts and desire to work things out. What happens subsequently
is grist for the gossip mills, but the point here is that they made efforts to work it.

It is important when going through a rough patch to keep silent in public, because 
badmouthing each other can ruin chances of a reconciliation. This is essential to remember when working at a relationship. If you are bitter and angry and confide in friends it goes back and creates bad blood and makes reconciliation difficult.
So is it possible to make a fractured relationship work, or like the famous poet Rahiman suggested in his Doha, will there always have cracks? Will issues cloud the future and shards of cruel words said in anger always fetter the way? The answer is, it is possible to reconcile but the most constructive way is with professional counselling. You sit with an expert who assists you both to objectively bring out issues that lie dormant and sort them out with that impersonal expert to enable you to bring a scared relationship on track. This is a method recommended highly by marriage experts world-wide.

"What you share with your ex is that history and cherished memories about a time in your life that was special, and the fact that you make an effort to work it out despite the challenges speaks of intensity and commitment in that relationship," says world renowned relationship counsellor Mary Jo-Morgan.

Time is a great healer and you begin to see things differently than when trapped within a contentious atmosphere where you feel you have to prove you are right and make a point. What is important is growth, metamorphosis in your fixed notions, and the desire to see things through your partner’s eyes. If after some time and space, you feel the yearning to make it work, and most importantly your partner feels the same, then individual strength within you two will bring you both toward that effort ,drive and power to bring back the ‘honeymoon’ period. Remember that if it is one sided, it becomes difficult.

Arnold Schwarzenegger made it well known that he would win back his wife Maria Shriver, when his affair with the maid and secret love child was discovered. In a situation like this, even assuming the wife is keen to bring the marriage back to working order, it is important to work out and ‘exorcise’ the resentment, suspicions, create ground rules, and bring in  support for an unfaithful man to help keep to his initial earnest desires to be faithful.

Interference and unwanted advice is avoidable, as it is always better to leave a couple to their own space and expert counsellors. As an irate Sonu Nigam had said back then- “I don't think it is right for outsiders, to get involved in anyone's marriage......I must say all this is affecting my efforts to do the right thing by my marriage. Only my wife and I know the true facts. This hearsay cannot lead anywhere."

Conversely what works miracles is support and encouragement from friends and family. To fuel the fire is the worst thing that can happen when a couple is vulnerable and struggling through questions and conflicts inside and out.




Ipsita Mallik said...

The problem is '' People don't want to hurt themselves these days''..So when one is gone, they start searching for the other one.That's the harsh reality..Even if after some time, ''they are back together'' the wounds of past still remains..People are too fast..Forgetting and moving on has become a mantra these days..Kudos to those who actually try their level best to work on their relation even after separation..

Satyush said...

Nice article...It can be done if the people involved r willing

Aradhna Sethi said...

Love it

joshua george said...

nice one !!! kleep rocking nisha by thee way i couldnt reply u in fb so that i wil send u request in other account nisha al the best keep rocking :)_

Nisha JamVwal Roller Coaster Called Life