Friday, December 18, 2015

Learn To Enjoy Your Friends Success?

Do you take your friends success with happiness? Should envy & competitive spirit be the stuff a friendship is made of?
Maybe growth and maturity is the ability to applaud your friends. They will enjoy your success too! Positive brings positive?

When a woman is able to appreciate another woman, it speaks of self-assurance & inner worth- and I don't mean pouring effusively.  I mean genuine heartfelt celebration of each other! Often people find it easy to praise & be nice to a 'poor thing' or someone where there is agenda & sycophancy. But to applaud and give credit to a triumphant and self-assured person is not easy. No one is too big, too great or too famous to receive appreciation & genuine heartfelt acclaim and it is nice to appreciate and say motivating things to human beings and to be part of their success. You can encourage and bring out the best in your friend rather than allowing envy and jealously take over which has the potential to form a dark cloud that bodes poorly for you and your friendship. Positive affirmation and seeking out the best in someone can transform their lives for the better. It is a power vested in each of us to be that inspiring person in another’s life.

I want to share with you , from personal experience, that friends don’t always you’re your metamorphosis with happiness. They actually sometimes envy even get annoyed at the attention you might garner. Many times you don't accept a childhood friend’s metamorphosis and transformational success. You still want the comfort zone of your awe struck friend. You are uncomfortable with your close friends and family from your childhood days who have transformed into beautiful self-assured beings. You expect them to be as dependent as they probably were or then you enjoyed them leaning upon your shoulder metaphorically and want to enjoy that same addiction.

It is wonderful and wise instead to encourage growth and metamorphosis in your loved ones.  You can actually be an important part of the growth process in your friend and interestingly this pushes your growth too. It’s synergistic. That is the only way to have long term sustainable relationships- to be part of that transformation and encourage and applaud it in your friends and make it happen for you too. Don’t resent it if someone’s overtaken you, because your time will come too and then your friend will be there cheering and enjoying your moment of triumph, transformation and exultation as well.

Once you train yourself to see the good traits in a person you will always find some things to compliment and make their day special. Without realizing it you will be giving yourself something to feel good about. Even acquaintances can be praised, and you have a friend and a bon-homous atmosphere to converse in. This of course does not mean fake compliments to prove points or allow for better networking at work. Being fake and superficial is quite evident, so being smooth and over smart is avoidable. This is about honestly sincerely spreading happiness for yourself and the people you interact with. It takes self-confidence and self-assurance to give praise and receive it.

Every time you put something kind into the universe, your world becomes more happy and enriched! Time Magazine's secrets to happiness has sharing, giving compliments and philanthropy as a top runner- not possessions- dresses-friends- handbags (contrary to popular opinion) so get out there and do something to make someone happy or throw yourself into a cause that drives your heart. Or many causes that set your heart on fire.

 "Connecting with other people and feeling part of something larger than ourselves takes us a long way toward happiness –contrary to popular belief–that money can buy happiness, so long as you spend it on someone other than yourself. Not only will you have made someone else happy, you’ll have made yourself happy too, a happiness buy-one-get-one-free special"
I’d highly recommend that instead of eating into physical space with material belongings be generous for the sake of yourself. And allow others to be generous with you- it's good for the health of their hearts too. 

Give and take is the formation of a bond and a long term relationship. A healthy relationship is based on reciprocity and give and take – where positive affirmations grow and nurture your relationships as opposed to pulling each other down.

Nisha JamVwal
@nishjamvwal

Instagram: nishajamvwal
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